Psalm 139:23-24
Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me and know my anxious thoughts; and see if there be any hurtful way in me, and lead me in the everlasting way.
Do I hurt God? Whenever I do something, or think something, or feel something, or say something that is not in accordance with His ways, I can actually bring God pain. That is David’s theology and it is mine too.
When this great man prayed this prayer he wasn’t speaking of his hurtful ways towards people necessarily. David knew any hurt he caused man had it’s core in a hurtful response towards God’s ways and Word.
My sin hurts God. It actually grieves His heart because He loves me so much. Like a father who wants the best for his son, my Heavenly Father wants what’s best for me. When I intentionally go my own way in life and disregard His ways, it brings God pain because He wants what’s best for me – He loves me deeply.
How often do I pray the prayer of change? The maturing man or woman of God wants change. They realize at the core of Christianity lies a deep necessity to be transformed more and more into Christ’s likeness – more and more into the image of God. Nothing and no one gets in the way of this person’s goal to be like Christ. He or she will do anything to be with their God. They will do anything to be like their God.
I want to pray like David. I want God to search through my innermost being and take out anything in me that is hurtful (to Him or others). I don’t want Him to ignore my faults in exchange for my comfort. I want Him to find them and change them into His glory. (Even my anxious thoughts, according to David’s prayer, are hurtful to God. When I have fears I’m not trusting. When I’m not trusting I’m hurting. Imagine if your child or grandchild didn’t trust you – how would that make you feel?).
I want to bring God pleasure, not pain. Therefore, my strong desire is that the Holy Spirit will work on me to change me even if it hurts me. I don’t want to focus on how others need to change; I want to focus on how Christ wants to change me. I don’t want Him to stop working on me until I’m all His, from the inside, out. I want my Father in Heaven to see if there is any hurtful way in me and change me, leading me in the everlasting way.
